Complete beginner guide - start here

Welcome, new faces. I remember when I first stumbled into this rabbit hole—overwhelmed, excited, and totally clueless. Took me longer than it should to get my first good piece because I didn't know what I was doing. Let me save you that headache. Here's a proper start-to-finish guide that'll get you from zero to a solid novelty ID without flushing cash down the drain.

Step-by-step plan of attack:

1. Read the State Reviews section like it's your Bible. That whole subforum exists so you don't have to guess which states work. Pay attention to which states have the best reviews for your region—don't just grab California because you live there. Some states are notoriously hard to get right (looking at you, New New York revamps). Start with the pinned threads in that section and note which states have recent positive reports from multiple users.

2. Deep dive into the Vendor Discussion area. Sort by date, not relevance. You want to see what people are saying right now, not six months ago. Look for long-term trust threads—vendors that have been around for a while with consistent quality. Avoid any vendor that has a ton of complaints about missing orders or terrible communication. Red flags include low-res photos in reviews, accounts made yesterday posting rave reviews, and anyone asking you to pay in gift cards.

3. Figure out payment. Crypto is the standard. If you're new to Bitcoin or Monero, spend an hour learning how to buy it, move it to a wallet, and send it. Using an exchange directly (like Coinbase) and sending to a vendor is a bad idea—they can freeze your account. Get a wallet like Electrum or Cake Wallet for Monero, buy on a P2P exchange or from a friend, and send from there. Don't be the guy who sends $120 via PayPal and gets ghosted.

4. Place your order carefully. Take photos in good lighting against a plain white wall. No shadows, no weird angles. Use a high-res image—phone cameras are fine if you know what you're doing. Make sure your head is centered, no glasses reflections, and no smiling unless the state permits it. Signatures: scan a clean version on white paper, don't just scribble. Choose shipping discreetly and pay for tracking if available.

5. After ordering, be patient. Expect 2-4 weeks minimum, sometimes longer. Don't message the vendor every day—that's how you get blacklisted. Once it arrives, compare it to a real ID from the same state. Check thickness, feel, font alignment, microprinting (use a loupe or macro camera). UV light? Look at the holos. If something's off, contact the vendor respectfully with clear photos.

Glossary of terms you'll see everywhere:

• Holos – The shiny state seals or images that change when you tilt the card, often using DOVID or OVI tech.
• Microprinting – Tiny text on the card that's crisp on real IDs; blurry microprint = bad quality.
• Raised text – Some states (like New Jersey) have embossed letters for certain fields; not all vendors do this.
• PVC / Teslin – Two main material types. PVC feels like a credit card; Teslin is a thinner, more flexible polyester that some states use.
• PE – Polyethylene, a common substrate for new US IDs (like New Ohio, New PA).
• Flipped – A card that's printed on both sides well, no misalignment.
• Batch – A group of orders from the same vendor and timeframe; you can compare reviews from the same batch.
• OPSEC – Operational security—keeping your identity and methods private.

Safety checklist before you press that order button:

1. Use a secure email (ProtonMail or Tutanota) and a VPN (no free ones, pay for something solid like Mullvad). Never use your personal email or IP.
2. For crypto, tumble or swap through Monero if possible—bitcoin is traceable. Consider using a coin mixer or convert to XMR first.
3. Never share your real name with any vendor—use a pseudonym and a safe drop address